I am actually surprised to still find this little corner where I have poured some of my thoughts long forgotten. It has been fifteen years since its inception, and the likes of Friendster, MySpace, and Multiply have already given way to the fast-paced entropy of technology. Nevertheless, from the bleary-eyed nineteen-year-old I was once, I have grown into an adult, still striving to navigate this world and hopefully, make a significant contribution along the way.
Yes, my dear, you were able to do the things that you wanted, and so much more.
You became a doctor and were able to join the military. You reached the rank of Captain and were commissioned in the Navy. You went to places, met people, and experienced life. You were passionate about medicine, politics, foreign diplomacy, and public health. You were deployed to near and far detachments alike. You treated patients, taught soldiers, and implemented policies within your units. You joined stakeholder meetings with government and private representatives, helped craft plans, and augmented resources to cater to the underserved. And yes, you were able to participate in international military exercises, even becoming project head for one of the medical activities, together with representatives of the USN, USCG, and JCG. And finally, you were able to serve those who serve.
Unfortunately, a hardball came your way. You almost lost your life. Your identity, tied to your achievements and status, was shaken. It's as if everything you've worked for your whole life was blown away. It was a long tortuous journey... but you came out of it. You came to terms with your status and condition. You gained a deeper understanding of yourself and a stronger relationship with the people around you. You started to build your life again -new goals, aspirations, principles, and values.
You are now a Family Medicine resident in a program that feels more like family, and a training that gives a deeper appreciation of the art of healing. You are now living in Intramuros, as your younger self used to dream. You are also an HIV Primary Care Physician, in an advocacy that you didn't expect you'd be involved in. You are blessed to have a Medical Director who encourages growth among the staff. You are regularly sent to trainings and conferences, being able to learn and participate in the direction of national programs for HIV/AIDS. You are surrounded by peers who you genuinely appreciate, and who does the same.
You are now pursuing an aspect of your life that you placed on hold. You are now traveling, reading, creating art, and biking. You are now able to explore life in ways you didn't think you could.
You've always searched for that elusive passion and brilliance you needed to excel. But now you know that it is something you don't just stumble upon but rather, you cultivate over time. You still have a lot of things ahead of you. Your principles and aspirations will always be your guiding stars. The path is crooked, with never-ending ups and downs. Enjoy the journey. You will get there eventually.
Keep holding on. We're rooting for you.